when i was younger, a day off meant VACATION!
now, it means having more time for organizing, errand-running, & homework.
my to-do list for today looks nothing like a passion-igniter.
but yesterday's message at our church certainly was.
after talking about how our small expectations can get in the way of God actually creating something awesome --
or, at least, get in the way of us appreciating it
-- pastor john challenged us to consider some questions during reflection time.
the last one was the one that got me:
what "small" dream do you need to kill off to make way for the big plans God has for you?
ouch.
i am notorious for planning first, then asking God what He thinks later.
and my dreams are often selfish.
so to be faced with a question asking what artery-clogging agent i am clinging to that is keeping the blood flowing to the right places...
well, needless to say i had an unexpected, uncomfortable about-face right then & there.
it's contradictory to say,
"i believe God has the best in mind for me,"
then go make my own plans & get angry at Him when He intervenes.
and my passion is squelched when i take it all into my own hands.
so i used the reflection time to do some serious open heart surgery.
i want those arteries cleaned out so my heart pumps clearly & in rhythm with Daddy's song for my life.
today, amongst the errand-running & such,
i'm making time to offer up dreams for the killing.
i know if He takes one, He'll replace it with something better.
He always has & always will.
and He is where true passion starts.
