day #69

spent last weekend in a screenwriting workshop.

this is a passion i've put off for a while.

i've dabbled here & there,

but i wouldn't allow myself to dive in.

with bob's encouragement, i did it.

it was a huge time & $ commitment,

but it was worth it.

i stretched.

i was uncomfortable.

i was creative.

and now there is no turning back.

to have that kind of opportunity & not do anything with it is ungrateful & unwise.

this year, passion is about seeking out deferred opportunities & acting upon them.

right now, i'm just feeling out a script concept,

but that won't be where it ends.

please hold me to that. ;)

days #22-#25

i've been off the grid, indulging a growing passion:

bob, a team of PHX creatives, & i made a full microshort this weekend.

we've been making films together since we met:

he directs, i write, & we make magic happen.

it's tough working so closely & intensely sometimes,

and we've learned a lot about teamwork through it all.

i guess my passion for making films goes hand-in-hand with my passion for my marriage.

i see them as linked, since they have been since day 1.

i mean, we met because of a video camera!

(for that story, here is the article.)

my trouble is that i can be extremely passionate,

and when something goes awry i don't know how else to react but to smother my flame.

it's like i'm saying,

"if this isn't going to go my way, i'll just pretend i don't care at all."

self-sabotage.

neither films nor good marriages get made that way.

this year, passion means keeping the flame alive even when the wind blows,

the oxygen is all but gone,

and all i want to do is snuff out the wick.

it means fanning the flame & believing that a fire can result.